by RAF KATIGBAK

Welcome back, Disko devotees! Here we are in the flipside of the New Year and, lo and behold, things are completely different! People are riding in sky cars, there are moving sidewalks everywhere, businessmen whiz around on jet packs, and all food comes in little pills. It’s the future baby, so get on your hoverboard and ride!

Okay, so maybe the double-oh-six isn’t so different from the year before, but that doesn’t mean we can’t push for change. While some more conspiracy-inclined types like to dismiss the yearly change as “just another capitalist ploy dreamt up by the bigwigs at the calendar companies to sell more paper hats, spinning noisemaker thingies and Far Side desktop calendars,” I see the new year as a chance to mix shit up a little. That’s why I’m spending the next three weeks in, as the novelty shirt says, New York Fuckin’ City. That’s right, party people, for the next three weeks, Disko Akimbo will be coming to you live from the Big Apple as I plunge into the murky depths of one of the East Coast’s nightlife Meccas. But since I just got in last night, and have already had the traditional Brooklyn 5 a.m. wake-up call (jackhammers, car alarms, ambulances, people yelling in Spanish), I’m going to reserve all the juicy insider info for next weeks column... except to say that it’s hella warm, it smells like cheese on the Canal St. train platform and reggaeton is everywhere!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch... it’s been a real female affair this week in Montreal. Tuesday saw a scorching set by DJ Mighty Kat at Salon Daomé’s Dizzy Tuesdays, and last night, DJ Mini took over the reigns at the Plateau watering hole Bily Kun. Mini continues a three-night blowout with her Overdose weekly, tonight at Parking, and then tomorrow at Aria. That’s maximum Mini-ness if I ever done saw some. Keep an eye on her newly designed Web site djmini.com for some seriously cool special guests she’s got on the way for Overdose.

Speaking of chicks with decks, in the tradition of the WWF (or perhaps, more precisely, the brief-lived, late-’80s Foxy Boxing phenomenon), Saphir’s Mix Thursdays night is dropping a massive Women on Wax event tonight, featuring four pairs of female DJ contenders vying for the same prize: eternal life (at least, that’s what the e-flyer says). Either way, it’ll be a humdinger of a night, with some of my fave waxsmiths, including Lynne T, Cyan, DJ Rue, Killa Jewel, Tashish and Jasmine, throwing down in a back-to-back versus style.

Three predictions for 2006: Owls will be the new sparrows, Weird Al will return with a vengeance, and reggaeton, house, folk, grime and pan flutes will combine to form like Voltron into a single super-genre (Zam-folk-house-grime-a-ton?). n

MY NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION: 1024 X 768. Diskoakimbo@sympatico.ca

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