by SARAH ROWLAND

Marcos Siega must be obsessed with plaid skirts—the L.A.- based director has two prep school comedies slated for release this month. Pretty Persuasion, a dark comedy that totally misses its intended Heathers/Election tone, is due out at the end of September, and this week we have his equally misguided Underclassman, a film that is no more than Beverly Hills Cop for juniors.

Nick Cannon plays Tracy Stokes, a restless baby-faced bicycle cop who wants desperately to get off the pedal- pushing beat. Everyone knows the kid’s got great instincts, and the only thing standing between him and his elusive detective badge is his total disregard for protocol. You know the kind: not big on calling for back-up, but very big on high-speed chases that leave a wake of overturned fruit carts and cop-car pileups. If he would only go by the book once in a while, his boss Captain Delgado (Cheech Marin) wouldn’t have to spend so much time busting his balls. Bottom line: Street smarts or not, Stokes has to show some discipline before Delgado will even consider promoting him.

Stokes’s chance to prove himself to his superior comes when the department needs a young-looking cop to go deep undercover at an elite private school. His mission is to figure out whether or not the recent death of a school newspaper reporter was an accident. To do this, Stokes has to get in with the preppy bullies who run the school, namely Rob (B.C. boy Shawn Ashmore, who also plays Terry Fox in an upcoming TV movie). While it’s obvious that Rob is implicated in foul play, Stokes’s gut tells him there’s more than meets the eye, maybe a stolen car ring or a drug ring or possibly both!

Cannon not only stars in this juvenile comedy, but the rapper/actor/ stand-up is credited as co-writer and executive producer. Which is not surprising because Underclassman feels like a business card for Cannon. He shows us his romcom potential by constantly batting his pretty peepers. He also maintains his B-boy cred by tearing up the basketball court Globetrotters style. But mostly he just works in a whole lot of his clichéd whitemen- can’t-jump stand-up shtick, which is pretty much unwatchable for anyone over 12 years old.

UNDERCLASSMAN OPENS FRIDAY, SEPT. 2

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