by JOHNSON CUMMINS

Maintaining their iron-tight grasp on the city, hunky local electro-punks We Are Wolves are at the Main Hall tonight, Thursday, April 21, with Goa and Hexes and Ohs. If you haven't had a chance to check out WAW yet, do yourself a favour and find out what all the hoopla is about. Holy mack, can you believe I just wrote a whole two sentences about We Are Wolves and I didn't even mention Suicide once?

Join in on a live recording when one of Montreal's funniest bands, Jesus and the Headliners, record their contribution to the Live dans l'garage compilation on Friday night at Foufs. Come on down and hear the messiah rock out to tunes about necrophilia, the Edmonton Oilers, deconstruction and Grizzly beer. After dying on the cross for ya, the Son of God is coming back after 2000 years - and it's Grizzly time!

On Saturday night, some local band called the Arcade Fire begin their three-night residency at Corona with Wolf Parade and Final Fantasy. Apparently, ageing hipsters like David Bowie and David Byrne have been dropping their name at cocktail parties or something, so tickets for all three shows are sold out. In an unrelated topic, did you know that Michael Jackson is on trial for molestation charges, the pope is apparently dead and the rumour around town is, it's spring now! Keep your eyes peeled here every week for other late-breaking news.

If you didn't get tickets for the Arcade Fire, don't get all flustered. There are still some tickets left for the next best thing (give or take a few strippers), Mötley Crüe, at the Bell Centre on Sunday. True, the Crüe were always mediocre at best, but they were also good at steering their audience's attention away from the fact that they couldn't write a song with an assload of pyro and a stage littered with scantily clad peelers. The hefty ticket price is worth it just to see if cyborg guitarist Mick Mars will be able to stand up for the entirety of the 90-minute show. My money is on the pull of gravity before he even launches into the opening chords of "Shout at the Devil." Did I mention that the entire audience will be made up largely of orange-tanned cougars and dudes who wear American-flag handkerchiefs on their heads? See ya there.

The Shipping News roll into town on Monday with the Field Register and Fratelli d'Italia (featuring members of godspeed you! black emperor, Exhaust, Tricky Woo and Fly Pan Am) opening up at Sala Rossa. Shipping News boasts ex-members of June of 44, the For Carnation and Rodan, and the new record Flies the Fields is sure to get the pocket-protector set typing up a storm on the Net. So what ya doin', Poindexter? Put this paper down and get your tickets right now.

Lastly, I expect to see all of you in the pit at the Cephalic Carnage show when they play at El Salon on Wednesday. The tech-grind of Cephalic Carnage in the venue's tiny confines is guaranteed to be absolute fucking mayhem.

AAARRGGHHHHHH! jonathan.cummins@gmail.com

>> Music Listings