Somewhere there’s an afterlife pub, where a table of suicides are looking down, perhaps putting off their regret a moment, and saying to themselves, “Why didn’t I think of that?”

Wolfgang Persieck, a 50-year-old Union Beach, New Jersey man, was bent on ending his life. No jejune head-in-the-oven, sleeping-pill-overdose, open-a-vein antics for this man, though. Instead, Persieck cast off his mortal coil in a manner far more disturbing. He tied one end of a rope around a lamppost, the other around his neck, hopped in his car and hit the gas, decapitating himself with one last no-joy-ride.

Two teenagers came across Persieck’s car later that night in a remote area behind the local multiplex. The two hailed a passing cop, who found Persieck’s headless body and several suicide notes inside the car. The notes, as well as statements from relatives on Persieck’s recent state-of-mind, convinced police they could safely rule out any foul play.

» Scott Saxon