Book retort: Ever deliver a book report on something you didn’t so much read as skim through while watching The Wrath of Khan at 3 a.m.? No? Then you’re probably four years old. The creators of How to Kill a Mockingbird obviously hadn’t read Harper Lee’s book, because there were no pirates, ninjas or planet explosions in it—well, certainly not as many as in the tremendously entertaining flash film at www.stanford.edu/~scodary/tkam.htm.

Man ban: Men get a bad rap in our society. If we’re not macho thugs, we’re ineffectual sissies. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. But sometimes you see an example of total dumbass XX chromosome behaviour that really bridges the gap between stereotypes. Witness: the ineffectual, macho man. The Man of the Year Awards recognize and even celebrate the shortcomings of such men—keep this away from impressionable teenage boys, or they might turn out wrong at www.pgacon.com/manofyear.htm.

Comments? Michael Citrome