by JOANNE LATIMER and SARAH ROWLAND

Being Julia

Say it in your best British accent: "Oh, the theatre!" Set in London, circa the 1930s, those naughty, pretentious, unfaithful, vain thespians are at it again, in Being Julia that is. Director István Szabó and super-producer Robert Lantos adapted W. Somerset Maugham's classic novel, Theatre, to the screen and the result is a sharp story of comic revenge.

Julia (Annette Bening) is peaking. She's a radiant star in London's West End, but she's approaching the expiration date for actresses: she's well into her forties. Her husband (Jeremy Irons) is devoted, but their ardour has cooled. Her son is now 17 and critical of his family's false fronts. Julia is introduced to a charming young American (Shaun Evans) and she can't resist his adoration. The affair begins and, as they say in the film, "it'll end in tears." A younger actress threatens Julia's homeland security and we get to watch as the seasoned pro squelches this starlet's blond ambition.

This film is all about Bening's face. It's magnificent. Szabó knows how to keep his eye on the prize, so his camera lingers only reluctantly on lesser mortals. Bening blooms under its attention and Being Julia is poised to become an ode to graceful ageing. (JL)

Head in the Clouds

John Duigan must have had his head in the clouds and his thumb up his ass when he wrote and directed this romantic war drama because his cast is hopelessly misguided. Not one character makes sense. Gilda (Charlize Theron, who's never looked more stunning in her numerous vintage get-ups) is a shallow yet stylish Art Deco babe living in Paris during the '30s. Her one redeeming quality is that she apparently rocks in bed, which is why her anti-fascist lover Guy (Stuart Townsend) is willing to overlook her Nazi-loving ways to be with her.

Speaking of Townsend, where's the chemistry? He and Theron claim that they fell head-over-heels for each other the set of this movie. Ergo, there should be Bogey/Bacall sparks burning the screen down, yes? No. Duigan can't even ignite the smallest of embers between two leads in the throes of a real-life love affair. The only thing flammable is Theron's wooden performance as the rebellious daughter of a champagne baron. After watching this, it's hard to believe that less than a year ago she was giving her Oscar acceptance speech for best actress. That's not to say she didn't earn her golden statue for playing a human dumping ground for johns; it's just that in contrast, this is one of her worst efforts to date. But she's not alone. Penélope Cruz is totally lost here as well, doing some sort of Frida rip-off as Gilda's jealous, bisexual, polio-stricken, limping Latin lover. Whatever she's trying to do, it's messy.

As for Townsend, who knows if he can act at all? But the Irish dandy better come out swinging in his next role and soon, or it won't be long before people start referring to him as Mr. Theron. And Duigan might consider taking some well-deserved time off to re-evaluate his career decisions, like the one where he told his Academy Award-winning star to say the line, "I like your willy, Guy. I hope I get to know it better. Tee hee hee, hee." (SR)

Being Julia and Head in the Clouds open Friday, Oct. 22

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