F For those poor, unfortunate students trying to sleep, study and live - whose lives I'm ruining with my love of BASS-CENTRIC music - swallow this with your Kraft dinner. No, I will not turn down the bass! Fridays I work 10 hours in a store and at the end of this long shift, at 9 p.m., I will be playing a fine selection of hip hop, dub, roots and dancehall reggae, breaks, jungle and even drum & bass. Yes, your floor might shake a little. Maybe you need to find yourself a weekly two-hour activity or call your mom in Scarborough to cry because I don't care that you hate bass! I'd love to be DJ-ing in a bar but all I've got is the store's CD player to play my mix CDs on. At least I'm on St-Laurent and so are you. If you can't bear the bass then get out and move to Outremont. Pump up the bass! [BLEEP!]

M Does original thought still exist? I cannot for the life of me believe the requests that I get working as a DJ on Crescent, Ste-Catherine street and St-Laurent - unbelievable. Just because something is stuffed down your throat doesn't necessarily mean it's good! The so-called pop hits of today, the only reason they are hits is because you people listen to them time and time again and you believe that it is good music just because you are told that it is good music! I am sick of this fuckin' mainstream shit being shoved down my throat!! You people need to learn the difference between music that is created by people who NEED to create and music that is created by people who want to entertain. There's a very big difference, all right? Stop requesting the mainstream shite. Thank you. Goodbye. [BLEEP!]

M I think it's very important that, before the presidential elections in the United States, Gangster Politics get back together and start performing again with the original line-up. [BLEEP!]

M Hey, Rant Line™! Ever notice how these ALTERNATIVE KIDS, with their homemade haircuts and their piercings and their thrift store threads, kind of diss HIPPIES? I just realized: they are hippies! They all live together, they got their little bands. It doesn't matter what your haircut looks like, kid, you're a hippie. You're all hippies and that's okay. [BLEEP!]

F I'm really sick of the way people are treating SQUEEGEE KIDS. Everyone says, "Get a job, get a haircut, blah blah blah." Well, that is their job. It's the only thing they can do because nobody wants to give them a damn chance in this fucking city. Next time you walk by a squeegee kid or drive by one, maybe just toss them a quarter, that's all they want, for food mostly, clothing, whatever. Yeah, sometimes they buy drugs but, hey, shit happens - you've gotta survive, right? So just give them a chance. [BLEEP!]

M In response to the bartender who was pissed off because he didn't get tips: I'm wondering if he works at Blizzarts, because I got singled out for leaving a 50 cent tip on the purchase of a beer and this guy took it upon himself to lecture me along similar lines. I was left wondering why this guy, who makes more in one night than I do in a week and a half, is complaining to me that I left him 50 cents for a task that took him only about three seconds to complete. He simply spun around, grabbed a beer from the fridge, spun back around, opened it and placed it on the counter. Where does he get off thinking that my 50 cents is not good enough? I work in the service industry at a Second Cup, you wanna talk about bad tips… I just don't want to hear about it. [BLEEP!]

F Waiters and service staff unite! I'm ranting in accordance with the bartender last week. I fully agree with clients taking responsibility for tipping, gum and vomit and, as a waitress, I have to add my own beef: impatience. If clients would not be impatient, this job wouldn't suck. If you don't have time to go out to be served, don't go out to eat at all. Otherwise your impatience shows me one thing and one thing only - not your self-worth or importance, like you may think, but that you're an impossibly insecure animal or walking digestive system that has yet to overcome its childish tendencies. So just go and whistle, shout, complain and wave your hands at Mommy. She might teach you a thing or two. Thank you. [BLEEP!]

M This rant goes out to the local bartender who had the three beefs. Maybe you'd like some of us who go to your bar to read you a poem or maybe bring you a nice pastrami sandwich when we come in, wear a suit and tie and a bowler hat - something like that? Listen, fuckhead, you work in a bar. If you want to work in a bar and get tips, cleaning up puke and dirty ashtrays just comes with the job. That is part of what you get your tips for. So fuck off and do your job - and smile. [BLEEP!]

Next week: Open forum